First, let me tell you that I love my baby boy! Truly - he's a wonderful son. Full of charm and humor and uniqueness. However, there are trying days when he wins the prize as "World's Biggest Stinker"!
I should tell you that he's 12. (Many of you are nodding, knowingly - "Oh, yes!" you are saying - so no further explanation is necessary.)
So an occasion came up when I, as a mother, had to fight back! I know soon he will be much taller than me, much quicker than me, and, sadly, much smarter than me. So I had to strike while I could.
Here's the story...a year ago my children's school had a Father/Daughter dance. My daughter, who is all tomboy, consented to us finding an "unfancy" dress and some matching Converse shoes to wear to the dance - she looked adorable! Hubby, the good father that he is, pulled out his tuxedo and took our Baby Girl to the dance. They took a picture that is just filled with so much joy!!
The plan was for the school to have a Mother/Son dance later that year. When I learned about this, I immediately joked with Baby Boy that I was going to wear my prom dress - since Daddy wore his tuxedo! His reaction was pure terror! Thus, my plan was born. I have to mention here that I'm not that weird kind of mother who would actually take my son to a dance wearing my prom dress, but Baby Boy didn't know this!
Sadly, the dance was cancelled last year - to the utter relief of Baby Boy.
But...they scheduled another one for this year! So, I've been talking for the last month about how I was going to pull out my prom dress and try it on and see if we could find a matching outfit for Baby Boy! He ignored me for the most part...
When the fliers were sent home, Baby Boy shredded his copy and stole his sister's copy and threw it in the recycling bin! He knew what was coming! But his sister, being a typical little sister, told me all about it! Baby Boy was being such a total stinker about the dance that I knew I had to move forward with my plan!
So, in the week leading up to the dance, my son moaned and groaned every day. All I could talk about was wearing my "beautiful" prom dress and how excited I was. So, finally the day came. Amazingly, my 25 year old prom dress still fit (I could barely breathe, but I could zip it up)! I found the biggest bow that Baby Girl had and pulled my hair back. I let Baby Girl in on the secret - that I wasn't actually going to go to the dance. She loved this and helped me pick out shoes and the bow. Unfortunately, the white shoes that I wore to my prom were nowhere to be found - really, it was before Memorial Day, but I still could have worn them...(no, I lied, I don't wear white shoes)!
I found 2 dusty plastic Hawaiian leis for us to wear and we hopped in the car ready to go. We had to take Baby Girl to karate first, so Baby Boy was in denial until we dropped her off. We were heading back to school, and I mentioned that I was going to take the freeway, since it would get us faster to the dance!
Here's an aside...my son makes this "tooting" noise with his nose when he is upset about something - believe me, with all the "tooting" that was going on, I thought a band was in the car with us!
Baby Boy was beginning to groan as he know our next stop was - THE DANCE! I told him that we probably had time to get ice cream before the dance, but if he really wanted to get there fast we could skip the ice cream. He screamed, "No, let's get ice cream!" So I pulled into the parking lot of our local Cold Stone Creamery. I parked and looked at my son and said, "Don't you think it would be pretty weird for a mother to wear her 25 year old prom dress to a dance with her son?" He looked at me with horror in his eyes and said, "YES!" So I said, "We're not going to the dance - I've just been messing with you all week!" I couldn't tell if he was going to laugh or cry!
I hope he's learned a lesson about being a stinker - and I can imagine Hubby, Baby Girl, and me sharing this story with every girl he brings home on a date!
So our evening ended with ice cream - not a dance...but there's always next year...and the prom dress would probably still fit in a year...with the right shoes, I could just pull this off!
And, yes, I did change out of the prom dress before we walked in to get our ice cream!